How To Make Your Husband Love You Again | 11 Ways To Get Love

If you’re a wife wondering how to make your husband love you again, you’ve come to the right place.

Feeling like your husband doesn’t love you anymore can be heartbreaking.

If you’re looking for ways to make your husband love you again, this article explores steps to help rekindle the passion in your relationship.

Why does it seem like my husband doesn’t love me anymore?

You may be wondering why he’s distant and how to make your husband love you again.

It may seem like he doesn’t love you, but it’s likely something else.

Many women go through periods when the spark of love from their husband is dimmer than usual. However, instead of a lack of love, it’s more likely your relationship has grown stagnant or distant due to a lack of communication or effort.

Additionally, suppose your husband has had traumatic past experiences and has yet to process them. In that case, he may find opening up or maintaining a connection with you challenging.

If relationship problems between you and your husband go unaddressed for too long, a wall can form as you take each other for granted.

Ultimately, these issues can cause an emotional disconnect in your relationship and make you feel worthless or unloved.

If this is the case, resolving underlying issues can revive the love in your marriage.

Related Reading: Signs He Doesn’t Love You Anymore

Why does it seem like my husband isn’t attracted to me?

It can be disheartening and difficult to feel like your husband is not attracted to you. However, many factors can contribute to feeling undesired.

If you’re struggling to make your husband fall in love and be attracted to you again, there is likely something deeper going on.

Too much comfort.

One possibility for his lack of passion is that the relationship is too comfortable.

When couples become overly comfortable with each other, their physical attraction may lessen because they’ve lost the spark of passion.

It’s common to get caught up in the mundane of life and forget how to make your spouse feel loved.

Unhappy in the marriage.

Another potential reason your husband doesn’t seem attracted to you anymore could be an underlying dissatisfaction in the marriage.

If things aren’t working between you, it can affect how much you feel physically attracted to each other.

Your husband may feel disrespected or has suppressed hurtful things rather than talking to you about them.

Related Reading: How To Deal With Your Husband Not Wanting You

Struggling with stressors.

Perhaps your husband’s attention has faded due to external factors, such as work-related stress, overwhelm with the kids, or financial difficulties.

Feeling underresourced can make it hard to show affection.

Dealing with issues outside of the marriage could cause your husband to pull away from you emotionally and become too distracted to focus on your physical connection.

Finally, stress can also significantly lower both partners’ levels of attraction to one another.

Suppose either one of you is feeling overwhelmed or overworked.

In that case, it can detract from your physical desires or preoccupy one partner.

The Date Night Workbook can guide you in regularly checking in with each other so you can address concerns within your relationship and feel more connected.

What do you do if you feel neglected?

If your husband’s attention wanes, it can destroy your self-esteem and eat away at your relationship.

If you’re feeling ignored by your husband, he may not even be aware of the neglect.

1. Ask why.

Ask him if something is preventing him from spending time with you and making you feel loved and appreciated.

2. Schedule time together.

You can then discuss ways to reconnect, such as scheduling regular dates or engaging in activities that both of you enjoy.

3. Show your love.

Take ownership of your part.

And do your best to show love, appreciation, and respect toward your spouse. Expressing love could include little things such as leaving encouraging notes around the house or making thoughtful gifts.

Helping him feel cared for via his love language can remind him to show you love too. (Keep reading for more on love languages.)

4. Don’t neglect yourself.

Additionally, remember yourself in this situation. Look for healthy ways to take care of yourself and fulfill your needs.

Take time out and try new hobbies or activities that bring joy.

Can your husband fall back in love with you?

The answer to this question is more complex than yes or no. While it may be possible to make your husband fall in love with you again, it depends on many factors.

For example, the current state of your relationship and how willing each of you is to work together can affect his ability to fall back in love.

However, there is hope.

With effort, understanding, and willingness, you can make your husband fall in love with you again.

Related Reading: Signs Your Marriage Will End In Divorce

What do you do if your husband doesn’t love you anymore?

If your husband doesn’t love you anymore, it can be challenging and painful for both of you.

Although it may feel like all hope is lost, there are things you can do to move forward and start healing.

Process your pain.

First, take a step back and give yourself time to process your emotions.

Knowing that your partner is here for you, no matter what, makes a relationship stronger and more secure, regardless of life’s challenges. When that sense of security is shaken, it can feel like you don’t have the support you need to move forward.

Whatever you’re feeling right now is okay. Allow space to feel what you’re feeling.

When someone you love hurts you, you may feel complex and painful emotions like resentment, heartbreak, or confusion.

Consider writing down what you’re struggling with to sort through your needs.

You may want to talk to a marriage counselor so they can provide an objective perspective and help guide you through this trying time.

They’ll also be able to offer advice on how best to communicate with your husband so that both of you can get the support you need.

Share how you feel.

Try expressing to your husband how his lack of love makes you feel – without attacking him.

Expressing could mean talking about the situation calmly without blaming each other for what has happened. Try not to point fingers but constructively discuss solutions as much as possible.

Remember that whatever happens next in your relationship is ultimately up to both of you. And it’s okay if one person wants a different outcome.

In addition, keep an open dialogue with each other throughout this whole process. You and your husband’s feelings must be respected for resolution and healing.

This creates emotional safety where you can feel heard and seen, which is essential for couples seeking a deeper connection with each other.

Work together towards understanding why your husband feels distant.

(However, just knowing why your husband doesn’t seem loving might not necessarily lead to your reconciliation.)

Still, it could help you find out why your husband feels distant and what it will take for your husband to love you again.

Schedule time together.

The most important thing you can do for a happy marriage is to have loving time together. That means taking a break from work, kids, and everyday chores to focus on reconnecting with each other.

Plan a special date night or take a weekend trip away together.

Whatever you do, ensure you have plenty of time to talk and enjoy one another’s company without distractions.

Having a regular or weekly date night can be incredibly helpful in rekindling the love between you and your husband.

Express your gratitude and appreciation.

Showing appreciation is essential to any strong relationship. So, take some time to express gratitude for all your husband does for you.

Ways to help him feel more appreciated

• Tell him how much his efforts mean to you, no matter how small or insignificant they may seem.
• A simple “thank you” or “I appreciate it” can go a long way toward making him feel appreciated and loved.
• Be specific—tell him what he did that positively impacted your life and why it matters to you.
• Tell your husband how much you appreciate him and how lucky you feel for all the little things he does to make your family life better.
• Show appreciation often through verbal affirmations like ‘I appreciate what you do’ or with kind gestures like bringing home his favorite foods unexpectedly.
• Another idea, tell him how proud you are of him for all the ways he helps you feel special as a woman.
• Get the Appreciation Game for you and your husband to play together.

Show affection.

Showing affection is a way of expressing your love and appreciation to your husband.

Not only does showing affection let your husband know that you care about and love him, but it also helps build intimacy and trust within the relationship.

Affection can go a long way toward making your husband feel special and appreciated.

When it comes to showing more affection to your husband, there are many simple things that you can do to make him feel loved.

Showing your husband affection can come in many forms.

• Reach out with physical touch, such as kisses, holding hands, or cuddling.
• Compliment how he looks and point out his positive qualities.
• Reach out to touch him as he walks by.
• Try to hug him at least once a day.
• Give him 5-minute foot massages.
• Surprise him with gifts or thoughtful gestures like leaving a note on his pillow or making breakfast on a random weekday morning.

People express their love differently, so if something doesn’t work for one person, it doesn’t mean it won’t work for another.

What matters most is that your actions come from genuine love and appreciation for the other person. That way, they can feel how much you care about them.

Physical affection doesn’t just have to come from sexual encounters; it’s also essential to show affection outside the bedroom.

Simple gestures like holding hands, cuddling on the couch, giving hugs, and back rubs—all these things can make a big difference when rekindling your connection.

Plus, they are excellent reminders of how much you care about each other, even when life gets busy or stressful.

Make time for intimacy and your sex life.

Making time for intimacy is essential to any marriage. If you don’t make time for passion, chances are, it won’t happen on its own.

Even if your husband appears to be pulling away from you, there may still be a deep desire for physical connection.

The most important thing to remember is that physical intimacy doesn’t always have to lead up to sex. (Although sex can help you reconnect too.)

Holding hands, cuddling, kissing, and engaging in other affectionate activities can all help bring couples closer together while allowing them to express their love and desire for one another.

Also, intimacy can reduce stress levels by releasing endorphins that make us feel physically and emotionally balanced.

Talk about intimacy.

Take the time to talk about what activities feel most comfortable for you and your husband.

Intimacy can also provide an opportunity to deepen communication between you while learning more about each other’s likes, dislikes, and preferences.

Maybe you feel like your husband wants sex but not intimacy– which makes you feel neglected and hurt

Ultimately, growing closer together emotionally leads to greater intimacy in the marriage, making you even more desirable to each other.

Add more intimacy to your marriage.

• Take turns planning date nights.
• Go out on the town and have new experiences together.
• Give your husband something special to look forward to.
• Get support. A marriage counselor can help you reconnect through intimate moments.
• Schedule sex. It may not seem sexy to plan, but it can help you feel more relaxed and ready if you know it’s coming.

By setting aside time for intimacy exercises, couples will be better able to enjoy deeper relationships and overcome any obstacles that may prevent them from connecting emotionally.

Related Reading: Intimacy Ideas

Practice self-love

When women practice self-love and self-care, they are more likely to bring their best selves to the relationship.

Women who care for their own needs tend to be better communicators who express feelings more clearly.

Therefore, as a wife, your self-care is vital to your relationship.

By making time for self-care, you become better equipped to accept yourself and another person with open arms.

Self-care can help a woman be kinder to herself when things don’t go according to plan. In turn, a woman is less likely to become overwhelmed or frustrated by everyday life challenges that can negatively impact her marriage.

Making time for self-love can also help a woman approach situations from a healthier perspective so that arguments occur less often, resulting in fewer conflicts within the relationship dynamic.

Fall in love with yourself to make your husband fall in love again.

Practicing self-love and self-care is an essential part of a successful marriage. Not only does it make you more desirable, but it also encourages a healthier, more substantial relationship.

Most women tend to prioritize their relationships over themselves.

Taking time for all the little things that make you feel good as a woman can help you stop worrying about how to get your husband to love you again.

Plus, you can be a better wife by focusing on being the best version of yourself and living a happy life.

Self-love and self-care mean caring for your body, emotions, mental health, and well-being. It’s about recognizing your emotional needs and permitting yourself to nurture and honor them.

And when you love and care for yourself, you can give and receive love more deeply within your relationship.

Self-care allows us to take a step back from life’s demands, both those imposed by others and those we impose on ourselves, clearing space for reflection and restoration.

Ideas for self-care:

• Take a relaxing bubble bath.
• Write in a journal.
• Listen to music that soothes your soul.
• Cook for yourself.
• Take up a hobby or activity that makes you happy.
• Get enough sleep.
• Do something creative.
• Dance.
• Go out in nature.
• Reflect on the next step you want to take for your own life.
• Speak positively about yourself.
• Engage in activities that make you feel content.
• Spend a fun evening with friends.
• Exercise regularly.
• Eat healthy food.
• Avoid toxic substances like alcohol or drugs.

Care for yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally – beyond just eating healthy food.

These practices can help reduce stress levels in both you and your husband, easing tensions in your marriage.

There is no one-size-fits-all approach to practicing self-love and self-care, but whatever works best for you will likely benefit your marriage.

Create better communication habits.

It’s easy for couples to fall into negative communication patterns such as blaming each other, becoming angry or resentful, or simply not talking at all.

Negative cycles can quickly consume your relationship unless you take steps to break out of them.

Like any successful relationship, loving communication is essential if you want your marriage to be healthy.

Ultimately loving communication comes down to maintaining the willingness to compromise, developing trust and understanding for one another, and investing time into strengthening your connection.

Healthy communication habits

• Listen empathetically when your husband speaks so he’ll feel safe expressing himself.
• Talk without defensiveness or blame. Instead, try to find mutually beneficial solutions.
• Respect his perspectives, even if they differ from yours. For example, contribute when he presents an idea rather than shoot it down.
• Practice mindful marriage communication to ensure you and your husband are heard and understood.
• Acknowledge what works well in your relationship rather than what’s completely wrong.
• Focus on building a foundation of mutual respect despite things needing improvement.
• Encourage active listening by taking turns sharing without interruption. This allows you to express your thoughts safely.
• Be patient with one another. Working through disagreements can take longer than expected.
• Respect yourself and your husband while navigating conflict resolution together.
• Don’t get hung up on who “wins” the argument when disagreements arise.
• Remember that love is more important than being right.
• Take a break when one of you gets triggered. Agree on when you’ll regroup and revisit the discussion when you’re more level-headed.
• Tell him what he does right rather than what he does wrong.
• Express appreciation for each other’s efforts. For example, verbalizing love, gratitude, and affection during difficult conversations can help you remember that you care about each other.

Get marriage counseling.

Couples counseling can be invaluable for restoring trust and developing stronger relationships between spouses.

Through the objective guidance of a marriage counselor and relationship coach, couples learn to communicate more effectively and develop a better understanding of each other’s needs and feelings.

By seeing things from their partner’s perspective, couples can work together to resolve any issues.

During counseling sessions, the counselor helps both partners come up with strategies that they can use to work through areas of disagreement or tension. This includes being assertive while listening and empathizing with each other’s needs, wants, and concerns.

Both you and your husband need to feel heard. Feeling understood can help you feel respected and validated in your relationship.

The counselor will also help identify unhealthy patterns of communication that are causing issues within the relationship so that they can be worked on and improved.

In addition to improving communication skills, counselors provide insight into conflict resolution, empathy building, emotional validation, trust rebuilding, stress management techniques, healthy boundaries setting, and making compromises.

All these topics are addressed within a safe space created by the counselor, allowing couples to speak openly without fear of judgment or reprisal.

Get online marriage counseling at Lasting Love Connection.

With our guidance, couples learn valuable skills that equip them with the tools for a healthier relationship.

Couples who work with us gain significant insights into their behaviors while improving their understanding. This empowers you to think beyond short-term solutions.

Furthermore, working together will allow you time to reflect on what your partner shares – leading to higher levels of mutual respect and affection.

We can provide an objective perspective on the problem while helping you and your husband learn practical communication skills.

In addition, we offer tailored advice specific to what is best for your situation so that you can work through any issues with more confidence and ease.

Let’s chat. Book a free couples consult for you and your husband.

Create new positive memories together.

Creating new, fun, positive memories can help make your husband fall in love with you again.

Having a more enjoyable time together can help you reconnect and remind you why you fell in love in the first place.

Prioritize time for fun. Laughing together often helps lighten tension during difficult times while creating new memories that bring you closer through shared joys.

What matters most is spending time with your husband and being present in the moment.

With enough effort and dedication paired with thoughtful planning, it won’t be long until those precious memories become part of your history as a couple – ones that will always be remembered.

Whatever you decide to do, make sure it is something that both of you will find enjoyable and memorable.

Spend time together without the distractions of work or everyday life. It’s an excellent way to reconnect and create unforgettable moments.

Also, ensuring all distractions are out of the way will help you and your husband enjoy each other’s company without interruptions.

Ways to create more positivity in your marriage:

• Participate in activities that make you both feel happy and fulfilled, such as taking cooking classes or hiking; these shared experiences will naturally draw you closer together again.
• Instead of doing the same old routine, plan a special outing with friends.
• Take turns planning dates or memorable getaways where there’s plenty of time devoted just for the two of you – away from family obligations or other outside commitments. That way, you can focus solely on each other without distractions.
• Do something on your couples bucket list that you’ve never done before. This could be anything from going on a hot air balloon ride to traveling abroad together.
• You can also plan fun staycation ideas like an at-home spa day or a movie marathon with popcorn and candy.
• Try to pick activities that include physical contact, such as dancing or horseback riding. This will help bring you closer together and add a sense of adventure to your outings.
• If budget permits, take weekend trips to nearby places and explore their unique cultures together. This allows you to have time outside the home and gives you plenty of opportunities for surprises.
• If there’s something special your husband has always wanted to do or see, then now is the perfect time to make that dream come true finally.

Related Reading: Couple Goals

How to make your husband love you again through speaking his love language.

If you learn your husband’s “love language,” he’ll feel more loved and ideally be able to express more love in return.

Everyone has a unique love language: how they communicate and receive love.

To find your partner’s love language, consider how he expresses love and ask what helps him feel loved.

Common love languages include words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service, and gift-giving.

Words of affirmation

Words of affirmation are when someone feels loved through kind words and praise.

Examples of how to show love if your husband’s love language is words of affirmation

• Compliment his appearance and personality.
• Express appreciation for a job well done.
• Tell your husband you feel proud of all his accomplishments.
• Encourage your husband’s aspirations and goals.
• Play the Appreciation Game together.
• Tell him you miss him when he’s away from home.
• Write him a heartfelt note to share why you appreciate his presence in your life.
• Talk with your husband about what made you fall in love with him.

Quality time

Time together can be one of the surefire ways to connect with your husband — anything that involves sharing meaningful time without the distraction of work or phones.

If you are looking for new ways to spend time together, pick up the Date Night Workbook for 122+ date ideas.

Examples of how to spend time together to make your husband feel loved

• Have a weekly date night together (even if it’s just dinner and a movie.)
• Take a marriage class together. 
• Cuddle up and watch TV/movies together (without any distractions.)
• Take a walk together in nature.
• Play board games together.
• Play the Intimacy Game together.
• Go to the gym together.
• Move around your busy schedule so you can spend time together.
• Try out a class at the local recreation center.
• Learn a new skill together.
• Join an Intimacy Workshop.
• Spend a night out with friends.

Physical touch

A physical touch love language includes anything that shows affection through physical contact.

Examples of expressing love through physical touch

• Random hugs when you walk by each other.
• Kisses on the forehead and cheek.
• Hold hands while walking down the street.
• Sitting next to each other on the couch.
• Prioritize your sex life.
• Take a partner dancing class.

Acts of service

Acts of service involve doing something nice for your husband without being asked.

Anything that makes your husband feel appreciated, without having been prompted, will go a long way in showing him you care about him.

Examples of acts of service

• Offer to do dishes even if it’s not necessarily “your turn.”
• Fold laundry.
• Run errands.
• Cook dinner.
• Clean up after yourself without being asked.
• Make them a drink or a cup of tea.
• Plan a vacation.
• Detail the car.
• Pay the bills.
• Bring him breakfast in bed.
• Pack them a lunch.
• Take the kids somewhere so your husband can have alone time.

Gift giving

Even if your husband feels loved through gifts, you don’t have to spend a lot of money. Sometimes, even a small gift can help your husband to love and feel loved.

It also doesn’t hurt to give practical gifts now and then since these demonstrate thoughtfulness towards his needs too.

Gift ideas for a gift-giving love language

• A new tool.
• Flowers from your garden.
• Chocolates or his favorite treat from the store down the street.
• Car maintenance items.
• Surprise your husband with something he’s been wanting.

How to feel loved by your husband by understanding your own love language

Understanding your love language can help you feel loved too.

For example, if you feel most loved through physical affection, but your husband expresses his love through giving gifts, there is a disconnect.

If you’re wondering how to make your husband love you again, perhaps he’s just speaking a different love language than you.

Maybe he brings you flowers, but all you want is a hug. In that case, your husband probably feels he’s doing everything to make you feel loved, but you’re still unsatisfied.

Reflect on your top love languages and share them with your husband.

The bottom line for how to make your husband love you again

It is possible for your husband to love again, provided you’re both willing to put in the effort.

For instance, you can rebuild trust and strengthen your relationship through meaningful conversations and activities focusing on connecting.

Taking time out of your day-to-day routine in your relationship is essential if you want his love for you to grow stronger.

Also, take steps every day—no matter how small—to show him that he is appreciated, respected, and loved, no matter what else is happening.

With patience and effort, these small gestures will help make your husband fall in love with you again.

Get more exercises like this in the Date Night Workbook.